Did you ever watch a toddler learn to ski? Young children learn to ski without the assistance of ski poles. They start by placing their hands on their knees and then they hold their arms out at their sides. They have no reason to doubt their ability and therefore they have no fear. The child is able to focus on the joy of the ride and nothing more. It is that pure and innocent confidence that allows them to glide down the hill effortlessly. The child possesses an inner confidence that is unstoppable.
What if we, as adults, had this kind of confidence? What if we could approach the obstacles in front of us each day with the only focus on the joy of the ride? Imagine how successful we could be!
With child-like confidence, we would no longer hesitate to take a chance, be afraid to ask for the promotion or hesitant to go after that client! If we had unstoppable confidence we wouldn’t need excuses. We would never procrastinate, and we would experience much less anxiety.
This type of confidence can become your reality. Developing confidence begins by understanding fear. Some fear is genetically wired into our DNA for survival. If you see a shark swimming toward you, your natural fear kicks in and you start moving quickly to safety! That kind of fear is good.
Overcoming the fear
However, irrational fear is learned. We are literally taught to be afraid. In order to protect us, our parents tell us things such as don’t play in traffic, don’t run with scissors, and don’t climb the ladder. Obviously these are important instructions and necessary for our well-being. But, after hearing these warnings repeatedly they become habits of thought. Our brain begins to place a possible negative outcome on every choice we make. What originates with – if I play in traffic I might get hit by a car – escalates to, if I take this job it might be a mistake. If I make the presentation, I might look like a fool or if I take a chance, I might fail.
Habits of Thought
Once we understand that irrational fear is nothing more than our own habit of negative thinking we are in a better position to change it. If we want to develop child-like confidence, we need to reprogram our mind. We must replace negative self-talk with positive self-talk and replace excuses with affirmations. Change won’t take place in a single day; but soon the positive thoughts will become our new habit. Once we create this positive habit, confidence becomes our default mode. And then, just as the child learning to ski is not hampered by a bunch of logical reasons why it isn’t a good idea; we too will be free to focus on how cool it will be to reach the bottom and how much fun it will be to get there.
Your journey to positivity can begin today. Every thought is a choice. Choose to think in a manner that will promote confidence!
Cynthia Corsetti is an Executive Coach and Speaker. If you’d like to learn more on how her C.A.R.E. to Engage system can help you create an engaged workforce in your organization, you can email her at: firstname.lastname@example.org
PS..Jump on over and join my private facebook group called Free Yourself Be Yourself — It’s an uplifting and empowering party over there, and it’s about all things related to your career!