Be a mentor
This time each year in our Hey Kids! Special section, we shine a light on the fun things available to children of all ages each summer. It's a great time of year, full of possibilities and wonder.
But the fact is, kids need more than a place to play. They need guidance, caring and attention.
In a piece entitled "The Bogeyman and the Bathwater," Stephen Wallace, M.S. Ed., national chairman and chief executive officer of SADD, Inc. (Students Against Destructive Decisions), urges all adults to take notice of the teens in our midst and become mentors to them.
"Given recent well-publicized cases of child exploitation, perhaps it is no surprise that the age-old practice of mentoring teens may be yielding to modern-day concerns about youth safety. But throwing the baby out with the bathwater, regardless of how sullied, may do more harm than good.
"Teens able to identify at least one influential mentor in their life, such as a teacher, coach, counselor, or neighbor, report a higher sense of self and are more likely to take positive risks that promote overall development and mental health.
"Just as important, the breadth and depth of the mentoring correlates strongly with decision-making. For example, teens who report high levels of mentoring are significantly more likely than those who report low levels of mentoring to avoid alcohol, other drugs, and early sexual behavior."
Wallace notes that surging fears about harm directed at youth may impair support for mentoring relationships; adolescents need, and very much want, consistent exposure to caring, supportive adults.
"A report by Child Trends, 'Mentoring: A Promising Strategy for Youth Development,' concludes that adults other than parents can provide important emotional support, advice and guidance while also helping to build selfesteem and self-control. They also point out that, overall, young people who participate in mentoring relationships experience positive academic benefits, including better attendance and better attitudes toward school.
"While parents clearly play the most influential mentoring role in the lives of their children, it is also clear that other 'significant' adults can, and do, affect important outcomes when it comes to education, social and emotional well-being, and health and safety."
He offers three basic steps to foster safety with your kids:
1. Stay involved. Know with whom your teen is spending time, where they are going, and what they are doing.
2. Get to know your teen's mentors. Working together will benefit your teen and give you a better sense of your teen's safety.
3. Encourage your teen's involvement in organizations that conduct employee or volunteer screenings and/or criminal and sexual offender background checks.
Nothing is foolproof. But Wallace's suggestion that we foster healthy, mentoring relationships with our teenagers is certainly an important step, and improves the chances that one day they may do the same.