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The ancient Indian tradition of welcoming the guest as God has stayed alive despite the countless changes our country has gone through.
The phrase “Atithi Devo Bhavah” has come into a new avatar, thanks to Amir Khan and his series of tourism advertisements. Awareness is being created within our country about forgotten courtesies that were symbolic of this ancient land of ours.
In the days of yore the Athiti or guest was a much awaited and welcome person. His needs were meticulously met, indeed the host’s entire household revolved around him during the visit. Right from selection of the food to be cooked, to the way his bed was to be made was the topic of serious debate. Funds were set aside for the expenses of the visit which included take away gifts not only for the guest but his family.
Visits to places of interest were planned and the guest was duly escorted by one or more of the family. In fact a family member took leave on different days to keep the guest company, lest he be bored!
A lot of time, effort and money were expended for the guest’s comfort. The household budget for the next month was later scaled down to make up for present expenses. Important family matters and at times even childrens’ exams were considered secondary to the great tradition of taking care of the guest. Compromises were made gladly or grudgingly at the altar of hospitality. The guest was All Supreme and nothing and none could affect his dominion or mar his visit. As the end of the visit drew near, the guest would be coaxed to extend his visit for a few more days. If there were financial or other concerns, they would be quickly set aside in the great tradition of Eastern hospitality!
By and by joint families di-integrated and nuclear families came into existence. Many customs that were an integral component of a large family either vanished or underwent radical changes. It is said, life goes on and water finds its way. New ideas and lifestyle changes made life easier. With the advent of cheaper and faster modes of travel, people interacted on a different plane of existence.
Hospitality of in-house guests also underwent subtle changes. Now a lot of new concerns came into existence, primal amongst them was time. Hosting a guest had become an art and science rolled into one. Who would receive the guest from the station or airport? Who could take leave to fulfill the host’s duties? Often with both spouses working, the modalities of hospitality had to be decided carefully. Moreover the number of days the guest would stay was a crucial point of consideration. Other equally important aspects were exam dates and office commitments. Hospitality was extended after duly considering the pros and cons.Unlike olden days; the guest also verified the convenience of his hosts before gracing them by his visit.
Another point of concern was the menu. Elaborate menus of yore, transformed into quick and easily cooked food. The friendly neighborhood restaurant faithfully made up for the delectable goodies that were erstwhile cooked over long hours in the family kitchen. Ready to cook food sachets helped dish up biryanis or rasam in minutes. Ready to cook mixes took away the grind from preparation of dosas, vadas and the like. The modern day Cinderella was empowered and equipped to tackle any culinary crisis, never mind the witching hour. One could now magically rustle up traditional food thanks to the wide variety of exotic mixes and powders available at well stacked food stores. Guests, family and discerning mother-in laws now smiled indulgently as they tucked into crisp vadas or stuffed parathas! No one is complaining…… All is well that ends well they say!
Sightseeing has also changed .It is a far cry from times when family and guests piled into the faithful ambassador with baskets of homemade goodies. Mother and Grandma would have woken up at dawn to cook the repast. Father would have been up and about loading the car with water bottles, rugs and the spare tyre.A jerry can of distilled water was also added to cool down the car’s carburetor in case it got too hot with the extra load within! All eventualities were prepared for lest the guest be inconvenienced. Grandpa would have woken the children and shepherded them into the bathroom for their morning rituals. The kids did not need much coaxing. A days French leave from school was a welcome delight to warm any child’s heart. In addition the fragrant aromas wafting from the kitchen were reason enough to wake up early. Not to be outdone the family pet would eagerly hover around the car, his canine wisdom assuring him of the forthcoming outing.
Now guests prefer to chart out their own itineraries, giving their hosts a respite from formalities. Food is not an issue anymore. Transport and tourism industries are perfectly geared to provide service of every kind. Luxury or economy class, the guest has to only voice his choice! Many a times the guest finances his outings and the hosts are not embarrsed.Deffinately a welcome change from the erstwhile custom of taking care of the guest’s complete expenditure despite the increasing hole in the pocket. Off course this is only an option.
Often times the host takes off with the guest for that much needed break from the daily routine. In fact guests are looked forward too, especially if they are family and close friends. Not surprisingly, it is at these times the entire family gets together to share meals and quality time .Sadly family bonding of this kind has become the casualty of living in the fast lanes of career and technology. Now a days these visits are an excuse to let one’s hair down, laze and cook those sumptuous meals mother used to make.
Short visits are highly appreciated by guests and hosts alike. These sojourns do not encroach too much on daily routines of work, study and lifestyle.
The stately charm of a separate guest room has been taken over by the collapsible sofa cum bed in the study or hall. However if there is a children’s room or spare room it is transformed into a cozy guest space in a jiffy. The children share their parents’ room while clothes and toys magically hide into built in wardrobes or utility boxes. Today malls and lifestyle stores are overflowing with all things necessary for creature comfort. Ranging from the exquisite to the utility one has to only decide the budget. Many a family stock up on linen and other items that an unexpected guest might need. In a few moments the spare space comes alive with candles, fragrance, bed linen, wine, cheese and chocolates. Santa Claus would have been shocked if not pleasantly surprised, had he peered down the chimney into the future!
Gifts that were the focus of considerable debate in earlier days have now become the easiest to buy. If the guest is family or a close friend the choice is made almost automatically. On the other hand, gift vouchers for purchase of anything from toys to jewelery are available for the counting. These are happily gifted and joyfully accepted. No hassle or awkwardness of hunting for something that fits into the host’s budget and the guest’s liking. A win –win situation for both!
Someone rightly said “only change is permanent”!
As long as mankind exists, relationships will too and people will visit friends and family. Though internet, Skype, chat and calling cards are available at a fraction of the cost as compared to travelling and hosting guests, the tradition will carry on.
Hopefully Atithi Devo Bhavah will be the ongoing mantra in a new Avatar.