The definition or a definition of stigma reads:
“a mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality or person.”
Other words associated with stigma:
shame, disgrace, dishonor, humiliation.
Have you ever felt those things? Shame, disgrace, dishonor, humiliation? Ever put your foot in your mouth and wish you could take back words or actions?
I believe we have all been there at some point in our lives.
Mental health, suicide, and even depression and anxiety are sometimes associated with stigma.
Fear, lack of understanding (huge, huge one right there), and sometimes even a lack of communication can make someone with a mental illness, someone who is suffering, avoid others, avoid help.
We have to do better. We have to fix that.
When someone who is anxious, depressed, in a job with high stress or triggers, that can only compound mental health.
Take my own husband for example. He struggles with those inner demons, PTSD (yes, he has it and no, he is not cured of it), anxiety, hypervigilance, triggers, and depression on a daily basis.
It never lets up, it never takes a break or a sick day.
It literally lingers around him every.single.day.
There is a struggle most days, to get out of bed, to get up, get going. Yet, even with a service dog, a loving wife, and two incredibly loving children, there are days that bed and napping and avoiding people sound so much better than work, or heck, anything.
The panicky feeling he gets, a knot in his stomach, heavy sadness–those do not just disappear. Overthinking a conversation, a situation, a whole-body feeling of frustration, panic, ready to collapse on the floor, curl up and sleep, disappear…that is real life.
If only we had a magic wand.
If only people could see his struggles EVERY DAY.
Imagine what we (society) could do if we were more understanding, better at communication, loving, better listeners…
We would not isolate the people who may seem fragile, or who may seem incredibly strong. Some folks wear masks to hide these feelings, these emotions, and I believe it is because they are worried about stigma.
What I want Sam to know, and others, especially if you are struggling with mental health, you are not alone. We go to battle every single day. It is okay to be sad and frustrated, I understand that. It is okay to have a boo-hoo or crying day (I have done that). But, I also realize that you are not a defect. You are not broken. You are not weak.
You have strength, hope, and love. You have beauty. You have a magnificent personality. You have feelings. You matter.
And when you voice your concerns, your opinions, heck, when you speak your truth…you matter. You are loved.
I hope you see that and know that. Even if you do not feel it every single day, you matter so much.
Stop the stigma. Stop the isolation of others. Communicate with people, your family more. Listen to others. Make an effort. Try harder. We can do so much better.