A study has confirmed that women and men envy different things. The psychologists also explain why.
Hardly anyone will openly admit to being envious. After all, we know from academic research into envy that anyone who admits to envy is acknowledging that someone else is superior in some domain, for example, that they are more beautiful, richer or more intelligent. And for the envier, conceding such shortcomings can lead to feelings of inferiority. Therefore, if you ask people whether they would describe themselves as enviers, almost everyone will say no.
Nevertheless, most people, when prompted, can recall and describe specific situations in which they envied someone else. The American psychologists Danielle J. DelPriore, Sarah E. Hill and David M. Buss therefore asked 116 men and 99 women in an experiment to describe ten situations from their lives in which they felt envious.
The participants were asked to include details of who they envied and why. The psychologists ranked the answers from their male and female participants based on similarity regarding the cause of envy. The researchers were particularly curious about how participants’ answers would differ by gender.
Women Envy Appearance, Men Envy Money
Men more frequently admitted envying the following advantages than did women:
- Greater success attracting romantic partners
- Greater access to financial resources
- Ownership of status item
- Greater academic success
- Superior athletic talent
Women more frequently admitted envying other women for the following characteristics than did men:
- Physical attractiveness
- Social ease
- Prominent family
- Better Clothing
The difference between the sexes was particularly pronounced in the domains of physical appearance and money: 17.8% of female participants remembered a situation in which they were envious of a more physically attractive woman, while only 7.7% percent of male participants could remember feeling the same toward a more handsome man. In contrast, 12.6% of male participants could recall a situation in which they experienced envy toward someone with more money, compared to only 8.4% of female participants. Men also stated more often than women that they were envious of a peer acquiring a status item (luxury car, designer watch, etc.). Women, on the other hand, were six times more likely than men to recall being envious of another woman’s more beautiful clothes.
Another Experiment …
In a second experiment, participants were presented with twelve different scenarios likely to elicit envy. The male and female participants were asked to rank the items from 1 (would make you feel the most envious) to 19 (would make you feel the least envious). Here, too, the results followed a similar pattern as those of the first experiment. For women, “More attractive” was the number one ranking scenario, while men placed the same scenario in sixth place. For men, on the other hand, the scenario most likely to elicit the strongest envy was a peer “Having more status and prestige.” Men were also significantly more likely to envy another man with a more attractive partner, which they ranked in third place, as opposed to women, who were significantly less likely to envy another woman for having a better-looking partner (women ranked this scenario eighth of the twelve scenarios).
The psychologists explained these results, and the striking differences between men and women, in evolutionary terms, namely “that men and women within the age of reproductive competition will most frequently report envying others who possess qualities that increase their desirability to prospective partners.” Given the fact that numerous studies have already confirmed that men are far more attracted by the appearance of a woman than women are by the appearance of a man, the researchers’ findings confirmed the expectation that women would be most envious of another woman’s appearance. However, when women come to choose a partner, numerous studies have already demonstrated that a man’s appearance plays a less important role than his status or money. It is therefore by no means surprising that men are more envious of other men’s higher social status or better financial resources than they are of their looks.