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Toys, chocolates, more TV time and now gadgets – indeed, children are far more demanding than trade unions! The unceasing demands of a child may create troubles for parents later on because the entitlements given to children as a gesture of pampering can turn into a big embarrassment, publically. Don’t we all often see children in supermarket getting what they want by stomping their feet on the ground and holding their breath?
Parents too when trying to combat embarrassing situations or any conflict between them and their kids, avoid the underlying issue by simply caving in to their child’s demands and tantrums. This further gives the children a confidence that they can get their demands fulfilled by throwing in some tantrums here and there. So what starts off as a harmless and transitory mood swing phase becomes a means to coerce the parents into doing what the child wants!
How should parents’ deal with a demanding child?
- Pay Attention to their Overall Behaviour - Parents should base their response on how the kid asks or puts forth his demand. Politeness in your child’s behaviour should be rewarded with praise and appreciation. This encourages good manners in them and clearly puts forward the message that their good manners will be answered with positive response.
- Listen To their Request - Parents should take some time to understand child’s demands and requests. Show them that you’ve carefully heard and understood them and are contemplating them. This makes them more tolerant and likelier to accept your response.
- Take your Time to Decide - Take your time and think about their request. It also shows your child that the message they conveyed actually registered and that keeps them from tipping off and losing their cool. Showing that you actually put some thought into coming up with an answer also keeps them patient. This is the time when you start negotiating. Yes, you do them a favour by accepting their request and can ask for increased study times or going to bed on time or reduced gaming time on your iPad. It could be absolutely anything.
Parents should also learn to say ‘No’ to their request
- Give your kids your reason for saying no
- Your ‘No’ has to be firm and should have no possibility of becoming a “Maybe”
- Don’t sway from your decision
- Counter offer; you can always offer them something else
We at Raah Edification, focus on bringing about positive behavioural changes in the child through focused attention, creative and interactive learning and positive pre-schooling experience.