Third Culture Kids (abbreviated TCKs or 3CKs) (sometimes also called Global Nomad) “refers to someone who [as a child] has spent a significant period of time in one or more culture(s) other than his or her own, thus integrating elements of those cultures and their own birth culture, into a third culture.” – From Wikipedia
People go overseas for various reasons (job, military, etc), but I doubt they give much thought to how much it would impact their children. Parents probably worry, ‘Will my children adjust to the new environment?’ but they don’t think, ‘What will happen to my kids when they grows up or when we return to our home country?’ If they did, perhaps they would reconsider going abroad.
Growing up overseas is truly a life-defining experience, and coming ‘home’ is equally life-defining. How you react to it depends on your personality, but take a look at this list of characteristics from Wikipedia. Personally, I found it to be amazingly accurate:
- 40% earn an advanced degree (as compared to 5% of the non-TCK population.)
- 44% earned undergraduate degree after the age of 22.
- Educators, medicine, professional positions, and self employment are the most common professions for TCKs.
- TCKs are unlikely to work for big business, government, or follow their parents’ career choices.
- 90% feel “out of sync” with their peers.
- 90% report feeling as if they understand other cultures/peoples better than the average American.
- Teenage TCKs are more mature than non-TCKs, but ironically take longer to “grow up” in their 20s.
- More welcoming of others into their community.
- Some studies show a desire to “settle down” others a “restlessness to move”.
- Depression and suicide are more prominent among TCK’s.
There are two major themes from this list that I would like to discuss: drifting and depression.
TCKs take a longer time than their peers to ‘figure things out’ because they spend so much time trying to fit in rather than focusing on their own needs and desires. Many times, they decide to stay in school because school is a safe haven from a world which demands that you know what you want and why.
TCKs tend to choose more autonomous careers (ie. not government or corporate) because they want the freedom to use their abilities as they see fit. Restless TCKs will likely have many careers, looking for the ideal fit. TCKs have a lot of ability, but they also think differently from their peers. It’s not that they don’t respect authority; rather, most supervisors don’t understand TCK personalities or know how to use their skills, and this causes job dissatisfaction.
At some point, many TCKs start to despair, believing that they will never find a community or career to call their own.
It pains me to think of how many TCKs suffer from depression and that some will think it so bad as to end their lives. In your darkest moments, you may think that you are ‘useless’ or alone, but you are neither. You have much ability and a unique perspective on life; it’s not your fault that your peers do not appreciate these gifts! Pick something you are interested in, do your best, and don’t worry about the rest. Though it may take awhile, ability tends to rise to the top. The next President of the US is a TCK. Regardless of what you think of his politics, Obama’s willingness to listen and accept opinions other than his own is both his greatest strength and a classic TCK trait as well.
You are not alone and never will be. The many TCKs throughout the world are, and always will be, your community. With them, you never have to explain or justify yourself. The Internet has made finding them and sharing your experiences easier than ever – for example, tckid.com. Who knows? Maybe several of you can band together and do something great.
Being a TCK is both a blessing and a curse. Your eyes are opened to a dazzling multi-cultural world, but you may find it difficult to adjust to your ‘home’ culture. It is like watching color TV – you can’t go back to black-and-white. Yes, it has made my life more difficult than that of the average American, and I never asked for it. But to know what I know and to see what I have seen…I wouldn’t trade these for anything.