We have all had challenging behaviours in our rooms or centres, but what is the best way to support these children? Sorry, but I am not about to give you the magical piece of advice we all wish we had. There is no one way to support every child. They are all individuals, they all have different needs and there are many methods and strategies to try. You just need to keep trying until you find the one that works for you.
One of them is focusing on good behaviour. Children who regularly express negative behaviour will often have to listen to educators talking to them about this behaviour. Asking them why they did it and explaining how they could respond better next time. However, are we making sure we are also connecting with these children when they have good behaviour? It can be exhausting, always responding to the negative and then when you finally get a break you can relax a little, right? But then those children are only receiving attention when they have negative behaviour, so it just encourages it more.
Think about the last time you got down on a child’s level, looked into their eyes and told them how proud you are of them. Can you remember their responding look? The beam in their eyes and the beautiful smile. It is just the most amazing thing.
Detail what it was that they did that made you feel so proud. It’s not just praise, it is feedback. Again, it is not a miracle solution, and they may start misbehaving as soon as you turn your back, but the more often they have these interactions with educators, the more likely they are going to be able to remember how it made them feel. It makes them feel good about themselves. It makes them feel worthy.
Of course, you still need to talk to children when they are not behaving in an appropriate way, but make a big deal out of the good moments. Celebrate them. Share them with families. I’m sure their parents would love some good news. Next time you see the child, remind them of what they did well and ask if they will do it again that day.
What are your opinions of focusing on good behaviour? Do you have any examples or other strategies to share? Comment below.